What it's only Friday.....................

I feel as I have lived a lifetime in 4 days. Brendan didn't go to school today - why should he?? 3 hours for what?? We didn't get home until midnight last night - I really think it did Jeff and Brendan good to see Marilyn and I know it did her good to see them.

I don't even know what time Brendan went to bed last night -- I know he had a pretty serious conversation with Jeff. I let him sleep until noon today --

I reached my stress point today -- I should give myself a time out -- Whitlee kept asking me when we get to see Grammy or I want to see Grammy or Can we call my Grammy that is always followed by I love her so much - Every time my heart is ripped out of my chest. Then I have to explain that she is gone and she cries and says over and over I want her I love her I want to hug her.

My heart hurts my head hurts and there is a week to go... I am going to meet Marilyn tomorrow morning to help pack up Grammys house. I don't know if Brendan is going with me or not but I think he probably will.

I just found out the service that was previously scheduled for Saturday afternoon is now on Friday evening at 6 p.m.

Whitlee is awake now -- crying -- I feel myself folding -- What the hell I'm letting her stay up!!!